Are You Setting Clear Boundaries?Jun 14, 2023
Setting boundaries is something that you shouldn't apologize for. It creates peace, maintains wellness, and even protects your home.
The thing is, we always hear people tell us to set boundaries, but how do we really make that happen in both physical and non-physical space?
When you look at your physical space, obviously you are the one who gets to decide what is being brought into your home. You are the one who decides all of the things that are entered in your home, and I find it almost kind of shocking when you take a step back and you look at everything in your home and that everything that you have was thought at some point, you had to physically or mentally decide to bring that item into your home, which is totally baffling.
So how do we create healthy boundaries? How do we create sustainable boundaries around our physical space? Obviously, this comes from what are we allowing to cross over that door, what kind of things are we allowing to come into our homes? Are they serving us? Are they not serving us? Is this something that is healthy and that's helping us, or is it something that's hurting us?
If you have somebody, if other people are in your home as well, what are they bringing into the home?
Is it a child? Are you setting clear boundaries about what they are bringing into the home? Especially right now, we're kind of wrapping up that end-of-the-year season and a lot of kids are about to bring home all of the stuff that they've collected in their desks. Thinking about it, what do we actually need here?
Your home is the most sacred space in your life. Other than your relationships, your home is that place where your family can feel most comfortable, that you can feel most comfortable, that's most relaxing, and that holds all of your cherished and valued items. Your home is that space. So how are we honoring that? How are we setting up clear expectations of this is our home and this is what we're allowing into it, and this is what our family values?
One of the things that I learned from a book that we did in the book club this month, talked about setting boundaries and how when somebody gifts you something for your home, it is almost an encroachment on boundary lines. They are then saying, "I am determining what is coming into your home. I am deciding what items you will keep on your countertop or, what you will have on display", and just recognizing that out of kindness, there can be a boundary encroachment and setting up clear boundary expectations. If you're somebody who likes to gift items, if you like to give people housewarming gifts, making sure that those items are reusable in the sense that they're food or candles or something that they can use, and then discard that you're not the one.
Remember, you have the power to protect your well-being and space, so do your best to set boundaries.
Listen to the full podcast episode here.